The right community

When it comes to health and wellness, surrounding yourself with the right community is just as important as working out and making healthy eating choices. If you don’t already, I recommend making it a priority to find the right people who are on the same path as you and share a similar vision for their future. Sometimes we wait for the right community to come to us, but many times we can put forth the effort it takes to connect with the right people.

Sometimes the right community does not always include people we are on the same level with. Sometimes it includes surrounding yourself with people who are further than you. This will challenge you to step your game up, mature and receive constructive criticism from someone who has been where you are and genuinely wants to see you be better. 

When I first started my fitness journey, I was surrounded by people who shared the same mindset as me. However, this actually wasn’t good because they did not push me to be closer to my goals.  They did not know how to because they were in the same place as me. This led me to be stagnant. It was not until I took a season to be alone to re-evaluate my goals and priorities, figure out who I wanted to be and how I was going to get there that I was able to make the space for the right people to enter into my life.

Making space

As I said before, in order for the right people to come into our lives, we need to make space for them. This includes the process of decluttering. Not physically, but mentally and socially. We need to declutter certain mindsets and habits that hold us back from who we really want to be. We also need to distance ourselves from people who hold us back. This is definitely easier said than done, especially when we really care about someone. However, we will only grow resentment when we keep hanging around people who do not help us grow and who we also do not help grow. It’s a tough choice, but one your future self will thank you for.

When I was distancing myself from certain people, I felt bad. However, in hindsight, I realize I shouldn’t have felt bad at all. This is because it was never about them. It was about me doing what I needed to do to get closer to my purpose and my destiny. I had a duty to fulfill my calling. I had to separate myself in order to help myself and others. Jesus himself took time alone regularly in order to spiritually mature and prepare for his missions. 

Seeking out mentors

As I said before, there comes a time where we need to surround ourselves and intentionally be poured into by people who are further in life than we are. This does not necessarily mean financially, although it can mean this too. But this also means people who are more mature physically and spiritually. When I first started my health and wellness journey, I wanted so bad to be like the people I saw online who had reached goals that seemed so far away for me. It did become a bit unhealthy for me, so I want to make it clear that I am not suggesting idolization. I am just saying that it is okay to look up to someone and aspire to be like them, but in your own way. Now, I look back and I can’t believe that I am in the same boat as some of the people I look up to. I have developed and cultivated a mindset similar to theirs. One of resilience, discipline and consistency. 

I say all that to say that you should have at least one person around you who you can look up to and can pour into you. Don’t let pride or ego stop you from receiving tough love. I used to be very prideful and did not believe that I needed help. But as the bible says, pride comes before the fall of man. Instead, we should humble ourselves to receive wise counsel.

Doing the inner and outer work

Lastly, finding the right community includes doing the work within yourself. This way, when the right people come your way, you will be ready to receive them. As I mentioned above, when God sent mentors my way, I did not have the spiritual eyes to recognize what He was doing and I was too prideful to receive them. I don’t want that for you. The way to avoid this is to do the work within yourself, so you are able to recognize when someone is trying to help and receive that help.

The outer work includes seeking out the right people. This does not mean you should force connections and seek out friendships from a place of desperation. This means you should step out of your comfort zone and speak to people, even if you have to initiate conversation. This also means hanging around others who think differently than you and who challenge you to grow. It can be very healthy to see things from other people’s perspectives. This is what helps us to grow.

Have you found your community yet? If not, what is one thing you can do to bridge the gap between yourself and the community you long to be a part of? Comment below!